I attract shitheads, and I've just sorta had this epiphany.
Josh was hung like a plantaine...relativly short and kinda twisted. Very small, very twisted, and a shithead besides. An annoying prick...no pun intended. Enough about Josh.
Now we've got
Justin. Monkey mouth Justin. Cunnilingus lips himself. He's a fucking narcaleptic. He fell asleep in the middle of CONAN. Fucking bastard slept through Conan, goddamn asshole. As if that's not enough, we have the firm conviction that he's mildly retarded. He's a functional idiot.
As for
Brady, he's about as smart as he was short. And he was 6 feet tall. His IQ was probably about as high as his name is long.
Let's move on to
Chris. Chris is an egotistical, short, obnoxious....two-timing, angry wanna-be Marine. With a very small pecker. Probably about on par with the plantaine. 3-3.5 inches. He started off with a dislike of my family as it is, and right there he's kind of a shithead. No shitheads get along with everybody in the family. Someone in the family weeds them out and goes "HEY! You're a shithead!"
We can cover
Matt now. Matt is....well, how the fuck to describe Matt? He's an alright guy when he's not strung out on all sorts of different drugs. Unfortunately, he's strung out almost every day. He's generally a moron. He's flakey to boot. He's smart, but he's never with it. He is more hung though than anybody else I've mentioned...for the record.
And then
Kyle. Kyle is an alright guy aside from being obsessed with skateboarding and Bobert. Every time we hung out while we were "dating" we were really just hanging out with his friends. Bobert was there EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME. Literally. Every time I did anything with Kyle, there was Bobert, and then on top of that while we were together he was obsessed with Kim. Told me he loved me...always obsessed with her. So we broke up so he could go be with her. He's not really a bad guy. Not really a good guy either. He's pretty mediocre.
(I've got this problem of attracting guys who like thick chicks and then dump me for thick chicks.)
Alex. Well, yesh...Alex. Technically not a boyfriend, but a shithead just the same. Pathetic. Uber fucking pathetic. On all sorts of drugs for depression...which got rid of all the OTHER emotions, but the goddamn depression. He's obsessed with Mac computers. That's his biggest fucking downfall. I mean that's like a mortal fucking sin in my book. He's needy. He's whiny. He's disgusting. Fucking pathetic.
Herpes boy gave me the distinct impression that he wanted to date me. In fact, he probably thought we were dating. He actually has a real name, but I'll be damned if I feel like calling him any less than Herpes boy. I get to NY after weeks of avoiding him, to him saying "We need to talk. Meet me at Aztec..." or wherever. I don't really remember at this point where, but then I said "Can't dude. I'm in New York." "Oh, when are you coming back? Call me. We need to talk." Loandbehold, he's got herpes. Like I fucking care.
James Pastor. First boyfriend. Not a bad guy...just kinda...immature...dare I say lacking in the intelligence field. If I was a little more coporeal, I'd hurt you.
At this point, we're reduced to people in New Mexico. So that brings us to Eduardo and Jakey.
Let's start with
Jake. We had to flip a coin for this decision....but Jake, just the same. God, where to start? Uhm, known him going on 2 years now. AKA: 24 months. For 18 of those months, on some level, he's been pissing me off. That's about the gist of it. "I love you. I wanna be part of your life." and then he vanishes. 6 weeks later, "HEY! =) Miss you." Well duh. I mean, c'mon, really. October 2004, "I love you. I wanna be with you." then we don't talk until Christmas. 2 more months go by and he decides to get a hold of me again. I realize he's random, blah blah blah. But jesus fucking christ. Actions speak louder than words. This may not be so random as it is I'm just security. Once the current whatever is out of the way, he feels like maybe he has someone to run to. I don't really doubt that he thinks he loves me. I just get skeptical when he says he loves me and wants to be with me, and then goes away. Sometimes I think he's more obsessed with me than anything. And something I wrote in my journal recently is that I think once he has me, he'll be bored. He won't want me anymore.
And then we come to
Eduardo. Let's see... the relationship was physically and verbally abusive. For some reason he had an instantanious dislike of Frank and my brother...and a nearly instantanious dislike of my mother. I mean granted, Mom and I have our problems, but still. Point remains. He didn't even seem to like the dog. I could start with the fact that we shopped in the same department when we were looking for clothes. In fact, we even wore the same sizes in jeans. That's fucking disturbing. I stole his jeans!! A lot! Biggest difference in the way we wore our jeans is that they were tight on my ass, but not his....or his dick. For most of our relationship, he weighed less than me.
He's a smug asshole. And a sore loser.
OCD. Not horribly, but definately OCD. About a lot of things. Everything has to be just so. But not like EVERYTHING...somethings he would let slide. But the shit in his pockets had to be just so. Every morning on the way to work, he would light the cigarette at the exact same spot every single fucking time. He would always hold it just the same way. Always drink the coffee just the same way. Always do the same exactly head motion when he walked into the Aztec smoking room. EVERY SINGLE FUCKING TIME. He'd always light his cigarettes the same fucking way. Take the shit out of his pockets and put it down the exact fucking way. He claims this is so he doesn't forget things...if he puts them down in the same spot, he won't forget them. Blah blah blah. Bullshit. He forgot things a lot.
He claims to have a distaste for violence and tried to use that as a deterant to keep me from practicing jiu jitsu.
And he's SEVERELY OFFENDED BY FLIPPING PEOPLE OFF! He's more offended by that than someone saying "Fuck you." He thinks it's crude, vulger, blah blah blah. And most likely he doesn't know the origin of flipping people off.
He's very condescending about anything and everything. Even when he doesn't know what he's talking about.
He's got negative energy...although that ain't the word for it. Negative just isn't strong enough for it. When Frank met him, he thought, "Why is Liz, hippie child, with a person who puts off the asshole vibe?" Negative people attract negative energy. People with bad energy, attract crap. And he might as well be magnetic south. Everything negative flows to him. He complains about how horrible his life is, but hey asshole, did you ever try to change it? Did you ever think that maybe this is karmic justice for the asshole you are? Seriously. Your energy is all out of whack. Change your energy, you change what the universe sends your way. Eduardo has negative energy. So he gets negative shit. And he always asked me why he gets so much bad shit...but it's all about his energy.
See my previous post about NEGATIVE ENERGY. It's true. But he never put much stock into energy, and calls me a fucking hippie. And it shows he doesn't put much stock in it. It really does.
Santa Larry in da house! And stuff. Not sure what's going on w/ the hand thing...
KD (Katie) and Larry. ^_^
Jillian Rae
Grant
Chris, Fred and Allison. Allison is our perverted friend, and the conversation gets much more perverted every time she's in the room. She's pretty perverse...makes me look like a saint. Not surprisingly, my brother has a crush on Allison.
Chris and Fred being odd....I don't even remember what they were doing. But they do it a lot. "Christopher Robins, I love you." "No, I love you. You're my Derfus." ...yeah...we all pretty much just go with it. Curtis standing off to the side trying to get out of the way.
Frank with some weird goofy hat that just randomly appeared. I was amazed he actually let me take this picture. 
Eric in the back and Grant in the front wearing my trilby. He loves the hat. Tried to keep it...take it home with him. 
Darcy, Me, Beth, Allison. I'm not really stoned lol.
Darcy and Fred playing beer pong. Beer pong is a fun game. Fred happens to be house champ at it. Him and Danielle. It's fun though, I like it. Although almost every time I play I lose. Last night, actually, we won, which was shocking....he landed the ball in one cup and I landed into the same cup so game over. ^_^ I don't even remember who we were playing against. 
Darcy and Danielle. ^_^ They're so cute together.
Danielle, KD and Larry. Frank is hiding out in the back. It sucks...I know...
Curtis...he'd been wearing the hat, and I insisted on taking a picture. He was drunk enough to cooperate.
This was an odd event. I was sitting there talking to Fred, and Chris and Ally burst in the door and say "OMG! We're joining you!" and jump onto the bed. I was smushed, but wiggled out of the way. "Awe, Liz, don't go. That takes all the fun out of this." and then I returned moments later with the camera. Poor Allison is smushed in the middle. Nothing happened. Don't worry. 