thoughts
I cannot bring to light any of this which consumes me. As for myself, there is no other way, and the discoveries that I have made I will never be able to bring to light. How I wish I can share the eternity of what I have seen...and this strange eternity has seen me.
A glorious rain cloud has engulfed most of the east coast; rain and power outages have been moving up and down the Eastern sea board. This kind of weather always improves my mood. Something about the tranquility and beauty of the rain washing away every particle of dirt and grime. I used to go walking with J through the rain. we would go stand on the foot bridge under the trees and just talk. It's one of my fondest memories.
Yesterday Michael and I went walking through the rain. I felt this wonderful feeling of warmth over come me as I looked at him through the rain drops. We were just in the cemetary, taking flowers to his mom's grave for mother's day. I looked at him from the other side of the cemetary walking towards me, and he looked very beautiful.
Michael wonders why I'm with him. He doesn't seem to understand. The key to life is not having a significant other, but having a person you love who makes you want to be a better person...who makes you better than you already are. H look at Mike and I don't see someone who's 27 without a future, the way he speaks, but rather, I see the most beautiful person in my entire life. He makes me wish I was stronger, wiser, prettier, and healthier, but at the end of the day, when all is said and done, and we are lying down in bed, he looks at me and pulls me close and makes me feel like the luckiest woman in the world. I may not be the smartest person, or the prettiest, but when he wraps his arms around me and tells me he loves me, I am only reminded that I am truly blessed. My life is not exactly the best right now. I have this heart problem still. No income to speak of, and I can't go back to school. But I have Mike, and that makes all the difference in the world.
In other news, I've been writing a lot today. I wrote nearly 4,000 words on my story. I'm not entirely sure where it's going yet, but I have a good idea. Stories, I've found, don't follow the paths you wish them to take. They turn into their own being...their own essence comes shining through, and it's up to me to make it the brightest I can. I have apx 12,000 words. So I'm 1/10th of the way there. I think a good length is around 120,000 words.
A glorious rain cloud has engulfed most of the east coast; rain and power outages have been moving up and down the Eastern sea board. This kind of weather always improves my mood. Something about the tranquility and beauty of the rain washing away every particle of dirt and grime. I used to go walking with J through the rain. we would go stand on the foot bridge under the trees and just talk. It's one of my fondest memories.
Yesterday Michael and I went walking through the rain. I felt this wonderful feeling of warmth over come me as I looked at him through the rain drops. We were just in the cemetary, taking flowers to his mom's grave for mother's day. I looked at him from the other side of the cemetary walking towards me, and he looked very beautiful.
Michael wonders why I'm with him. He doesn't seem to understand. The key to life is not having a significant other, but having a person you love who makes you want to be a better person...who makes you better than you already are. H look at Mike and I don't see someone who's 27 without a future, the way he speaks, but rather, I see the most beautiful person in my entire life. He makes me wish I was stronger, wiser, prettier, and healthier, but at the end of the day, when all is said and done, and we are lying down in bed, he looks at me and pulls me close and makes me feel like the luckiest woman in the world. I may not be the smartest person, or the prettiest, but when he wraps his arms around me and tells me he loves me, I am only reminded that I am truly blessed. My life is not exactly the best right now. I have this heart problem still. No income to speak of, and I can't go back to school. But I have Mike, and that makes all the difference in the world.
In other news, I've been writing a lot today. I wrote nearly 4,000 words on my story. I'm not entirely sure where it's going yet, but I have a good idea. Stories, I've found, don't follow the paths you wish them to take. They turn into their own being...their own essence comes shining through, and it's up to me to make it the brightest I can. I have apx 12,000 words. So I'm 1/10th of the way there. I think a good length is around 120,000 words.
posted by squishedlizard at 10:02 PM
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